The offer is sitting in your inbox, and the number is lower than you hoped. You know you are supposed to negotiate. Everyone says to negotiate. But nobody shows you the actual words, and the gap between "just ask for more" and a blank email draft is where most people fold and type "I accept."
So here are the actual words: a script for the first counter, a script for the polite nudge when their improved number is still short, and a script for responding when they say "that is our final number." All of them grounded in one rule that protects you the whole way through.
The one rule: claim only what you can defend
Every persuasive sentence in a negotiation email is a claim, and the other side gets to test any of them. So build your emails exclusively from claims that survive a follow up question:
- Market data is defensible. "Postings and salary data for this role in this metro cluster around $95,000 to $105,000" invites them to check, and checking is fine because you already did. (If you have not, research your market rate first; it is an evening of work that pays for itself for years.)
- Your scope is defensible. "I would be bringing the vendor management piece you said the team currently lacks" points at their own words from the interview.
- A real competing offer is defensible. If you genuinely have one, you may reference it, ideally without weaponizing the details.
- An invented competing offer is a time bomb. Recruiters respond to competing offers by asking questions ("Where? What stage? What number?") or by accelerating their timeline to force your hand, and a phantom offer collapses under either. When it collapses, so does the offer you actually had, because now you are a liar in their notes.
Negotiating without a competing offer is completely normal. Market data plus your specific value is a full toolkit. You never need the fake offer, and you can never afford it.
Script one: the first counter
Send it within a day or two of the offer, after you have verified your market number. Anatomy: enthusiasm, a specific ask, one or two defensible reasons, an easy close.
Subject: Re: Offer, Program Manager
>
Hi Talia,
>
Thank you for the offer; I am genuinely excited about the role, and the conversations with the team confirmed this is where I want to be. I would like to discuss one part of the package: base salary.
>
The offer is $82,000. Based on current market data for program manager roles in this region, and the vendor management experience I would be bringing to the gap Sam described, I was expecting something closer to $92,000. If we can get to that number, I am ready to accept right away.
>
Thanks for considering it, and happy to talk it through by phone if easier.
>
Best,
Dana Reyes
Details doing the work here:
- A single number, not a range. Give a range and they hear the bottom of it. Pick the number your research supports, set it slightly above your true target to leave motion room, and say it plainly.
- "I am ready to accept right away." This is your strongest card. It converts your counter from an open ended demand into a one step close, and recruiters, who are paid to close, push hard internally for candidates who make it this clean.
- No apology, no hedge. Not "I hate to ask, but..." and not "I understand if this is impossible." Negotiation is an expected phase of hiring; the recruiter has done this dance hundreds of times and will not faint.
If the offer is not just a bit low but dramatically below market, the calculus shifts somewhat; see how to counter a lowball offer for that version.
Script two: the "can you do better" nudge
They came back up, but not enough. Say the offer moved from $82,000 to $86,000 against your $92,000 ask. One respectful nudge is normal; the key is to signal that this is the last round, not the second of many.
Hi Talia,
>
I appreciate you going to bat on this; moving to $86,000 tells me the team wants to make it work, and I want that too.
>
I will be direct so we can wrap this up quickly: at $90,000 I will sign today. That number keeps me aligned with the market data we discussed, and it settles the decision for me completely.
>
If that works, send the updated letter and I am in.
>
Best,
Dana
Why this shape works: it credits their movement (someone really did argue for you internally), it names one final number, and it attaches the number to an immediate, unconditional yes. What kills deals at this stage is scope creep, coming back with a new number and extra vacation and a title bump. New demands in round two teach them that yes never arrives. One number, one close.
Script three: answering "that is our final number"
First, believe them. "Final" is sometimes soft, but treating it as soft is how candidates talk themselves into a third round that sours everything. The professional move is to take base salary off the table and check the levers that live in different budgets, because compensation is more than the salary line.
Hi Talia,
>
Understood, and I appreciate the straight answer. I am still very interested, so let me ask about two things outside base salary that would close the gap for me:
>
- A signing bonus of $4,000, which bridges part of the difference in year one.
- A compensation review at six months, with the criteria for an increase agreed in writing now.
>
If we can do those, I am ready to accept. Either way, thank you for how you have handled this process.
>
Best,
Dana
Signing bonuses, an extra week of PTO, remote or hybrid flexibility, a professional development budget, and structured early reviews are frequently approvable even when the salary band is genuinely locked, because they come out of different pools or cost nothing at all. There is a whole menu of benefits you can negotiate when salary is fixed; pick the one or two that matter most to you rather than reading them the list.
And then decide. If the final package clears your true minimum, accept warmly and confirm every negotiated term in your acceptance email, especially the ones agreed only on calls. If it does not clear your minimum, decline honestly, without bluffing, and keep the bridge intact.
The quiet truth about leverage
One thing no script can hide: the person with two offers negotiates differently than the person with one, not because their emails are better, but because their alternatives are real. Every word above works harder when walking away is genuinely on your table.
Which means the deepest negotiation prep happens weeks earlier, in the application pipeline. More interviews means more offers means every one of these emails carries real weight. If your applications have been stalling before humans ever see them, that is leverage leaking away invisibly. The free scan at careerbounce.io shows you exactly what applicant tracking systems read from your resume, which parts parse cleanly and which get scrambled, free, on your device, with your resume never leaving your computer. It cannot negotiate for you and it will not promise you offers. It just helps make sure the pipeline that creates your leverage is actually flowing.